Choosing the Right Sex Therapist or Coach: Common Mistakes to Avoid

As a certified sex and relationships coach with years of experience helping clients navigate their intimate lives, I've seen how transformative working with the right sex therapist or coach can be - and how challenging finding the right fit can be. Let's explore the key mistakes to avoid during your search for a qualified sex therapy or coaching professional.

Not Verifying Credentials and Certification

One of the most crucial mistakes is working with an uncertified practitioner. Licensed sex therapists or certified coaches should have specific training in sexual health and relationships, typically through organizations like AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists) or similar professional bodies. Always verify their credentials and ensure they're licensed to practice in your state.

Ignoring Your Comfort Level

While discussing intimate matters can feel uncomfortable at first, you should feel relatively at ease with your therapist or coach’s communication style and approach. Pay attention to how they respond during the initial consultation. Do they create a non-judgmental space? Are they respectful of your boundaries? Your comfort is paramount for successful therapy or coaching.

Choosing Based on Price Alone

While budget matters, selecting a sex therapist or coach solely based on their fees can be counterproductive. The least expensive option isn't always the best value. Consider the therapist or coach’s experience, specialization, and approach. Many offer sliding scale fees or payment plans - don't be afraid to discuss financial arrangements.

Not Checking Their Specialization

Sex therapy and coaching cover a wide range of concerns - from intimacy issues to sexual dysfunction, trauma recovery, and gender identity exploration. Ensure your therapist or coach has experience with your specific concerns. A general sex therapist or coach may not be the best fit if you need help with a specialized issue.

Overlooking Location and Availability

Consider practical aspects like office location and scheduling flexibility. While virtual sessions are increasingly common, ensure you're comfortable with the format offered. Also check their availability - having to wait weeks between sessions might not be ideal for your needs.

Disregarding Cultural Competency

Your therapist or coach should understand and respect your cultural background, religious beliefs, and value system. Cultural competency is essential for effective therapy and coaching. Don't hesitate to ask about their experience working with clients from your cultural background.

Rushing the Decision

Take time to research and possibly consult with multiple therapists or coaches before making a choice. Many offer initial consultations - use these to ask questions about their approach, experience, and treatment methods. Think of it as interviewing them for an important role in your personal growth journey.

Not Discussing Treatment Goals

A common oversight is failing to discuss specific treatment goals and expected timeframes. While therapy and coaching aren’t always linear, having clear objectives and understanding the therapeutic approach helps set realistic expectations and measure progress.

Remember, finding the right sex therapist or coach is an investment in your sexual health and overall wellbeing. Take time to make an informed decision, trust your instincts, and don't settle for a therapist who doesn't meet your needs. The right therapeutic relationship can be transformative in helping you achieve your intimate health goals.

Have you had experience working with a sex therapist or coach? What factors helped you make your choice? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

As a sex, love and relationships coach, I’d love to share with you how I can support you.

Book a consulation call with me or send me a message and we’ll talk about how coaching can help you.