Oli, a beautiful, vivacious and sensitive woman who came to me wanting to experience her relationship with her long-term partner more fully without obsessively worrying that she’ll get bored or that he’ll leave her.
This became possible as we uncovered parts of Oli that needed and wanted love and acceptance. The uncovering of these pieces of Oli came in part, through Breathwork.
Today Oli enjoys the safety of her own body, celebrates the power of her mind, and lives a healthy relationship full of love and pleasure like she never has before.
Here’s Oli’s experience of the practice in her own words….
There’s something about the breath that is so powerful. I mean, it keeps us alive right?
But coming to learn that working with the breath to achieve different states of mind and body is truly magical. Since studying Drama in school, I quickly learnt that a lot of us don’t breathe properly - that is we take shallow breaths into the chest - and this affects the way we move and speak on stage, as well as creating unnecessary tension.
Taking deep belly breaths can make room for expression, volume and pause, as well as releasing unwanted tension.
So I knew that on a base level, deep and shallow breaths can shift your disposition.
However, only since working with Andrea do I now understand the capacity of breath as a practice of healing. A method of finding inner bliss and accepting inner wisdom.
My First Go at Breathwork
In a recent session with Andrea, we decided to work on a continued source of tension for me. The fear of rejection, loneliness and feeling unlovable. We came up with a mantra, an intention, a truth, for my psyche to acknowledge during the practice.
“Whether I am alone or with friends, I am loved no matter what.”
While Andrea played some relaxing music, I shook out any surface level tension, and then began with some peaceful and relaxing breaths. Then moved into the Breathwork.
Breathing in through the mouth, into the chest, then the belly, then out through the mouth. After a few rounds of continuous breath, the pattern became faster, and I noticed a lot of tension and fear building in my body. I felt the familiar pain in my throat show up intensely. A tingling spread throughout my body, particularly my fingers, and was guided to let out whatever needed to come out.
I cried. I wretched. I shook. I kicked. I wailed. I growled. I wanted whatever was holding me back, out of my body.
Andrea repeated my mantra: “Whether you are alone, or with friends, you are loved no matter what.”
This was hard to hear and I cried some more. Trying not to judge it but let whatever needed to happen, happen.
After what felt like a really long time, I let go of the Breath and Andrea guided me into a state of calm. I resourced (located a soft part of my body) from my belly and then my pleasure, holding myself in warmth, safety and sensuality, breathing deeply into my pleasure. Stroking different parts of my body, my neck, my inner thighs, inner arms and face. Letting the pleasure wash over me.
However, even in the state of calm after, I still felt a little tense, particularly in my throat. After a few more deep sighs, I cried again. Letting the tears flow and the bliss wash over me.
“Whether I am alone or with friends, I am loved no matter what.”
Holding myself in this truth, I knew I had more work to do, but felt relieved at the awareness and the path I am on.
The Second Go at Breathwork (Solo)
Trying this practice out on my own for the first time was a different experience, as I find myself holding back from letting go completely without the ‘real time’ support of Andrea - but an audio guide. However, with more practice I trust that I can do this.
Again, after a quick body shake, I took myself to place of calm with deep full-bodied breaths. With Andrea’s voice in my ears, I was guided to set an intention. I chose “a gentle practice of letting go of whatever shows up.” I chose gentle considering it was the morning and I wasn’t prepared to go deep without live support on my first solo go. However, I tend to wake up with tension in my chest, and was open to releasing it in this practice.
I was now familiar with the breathing pattern, and began to feel the tingling sensation and lightheadedness. As the pace quickened, I was guided to start releasing whatever was coming up for me.
I felt tears roll from my eyes - I wasn’t necessarily crying, but more like when you do a big yawn, and tears come from the release. I stretched and shook. Though when I was told to Sound, I held back most noise, fearing judgement from my housemates or people passing by my open window. (Next time I’ll let go of this).
But I did ask for a gentle practice, and when I felt myself going too far, the build up of panic and intense tingling, I took more normal breaths.
I continued to release tension from my muscles and my face, yawning and releasing.
Towards the end, I was guided into pleasure. This felt so nourishing and with the sunlight on my face through the window, I felt spacious and calm. Ready to take on the day.