Sex is like surfing.
Learn how to ride the waves of your sexual energy and you’ll feel it’s magnificent force as a full bodied pleasure experience.
And who doesn’t want a full-bodied experience of pleasure?
If you could control your ejaculatory reflex and spread the experience of arousal throughout your whole body, rather than having it just centered around the head of your penis, why wouldn’t you?
In order to do this, you’ll need to be able to fully surrender to your turn-on, like a surfer surrenders to the power of the wave.
In surrendering, the surfer relaxes into the rise and fall of the power of the ocean beneath him.
At the same time, he remains open and connected to his body. He is completely present.
Same thing with sexual arousal.
When you learn to relax into your pleasure and ride the wave versus clamping down on it, repressing it or controlling it you become super sensitive to pleasure.
So much so that you can move and spread that energy throughout your body and experience expanded states of bliss.
Open, surrendered, and connected are the states you’ll need to be in to ride the waves of pleasure.
One of the most powerful tools for opening yourself up to these states is to use your voice. To ‘sound’.
Sounding in sex is allowing your body to have a voice.
It’s giving sound or voice to whatever part of you wants to express itself in that moment.
It’s allowing whatever sounds that want to emerge from you to come out however they want to come out. And not judging them.
Often times we are ashamed of making noise during sex, and we clamp down on the sounds that would naturally come out.
This could come through years of adolescence where masturbation happened on the down low and as quickly as possible so no one would hear.
And so men are expected to emit an occasional grunt or groan, but not much else in sex.
Women are also assigned a set of ‘proper’ sounds during sex.
But as is so often the case, what we are sold as acceptable ‘normal’ sex sounds are scripted for Hollywood or porn and are limited.
We humans are much more interesting than that.
So let yourself go.
You can get used to the sound of your own voice first in masturbation. Self-pleasure is a great place tp start. Let the sounds come forth wild an uninhibited, and you may just find that the powerful raw sexual desire, lusty and potent, rises within as well.
You may feel a bit silly for it at first. Remember that no one is watching.
Full-bodied pleasure is yours to be had.
Claim it.
The more you love and accept yourself for your truest, fullest expression, the more you open yourself up to being loved exactly this way by another.